Payback
by ItaKure
Summary: Its Friday the 13th and Itachi's superstitious, this means its time for Kisame to get some revenge. Problem is Tobi was the last with the camera and when Tobes is the last with anything there's bound to be trouble lurking around every corner. No pairs.


**IK: Hey everyone! Your favorite little curse, ItaKure here on my favorite day of the year. Friday the 13th! Well today I have Tachi-kun, Same-kun, Sasuke-kun, and Sakura-chan here with me. Say hi guys!**

**All: … hi.**

**Sasu: You're hyper today.**

**IK: No, Just excited about the fanfic.**

**K: What's for breakfast?**

**I: Good question.**

**IK: I think we have waffles… if not I'll make some-**

**Saku: There's no waffles Red.**

**I: No cereal either.**

**K: I am NOT going to eat t-**

**SasuSaku: DON'T SAY IT!**

**K: oast!**

**IK: WELL**

**I and Sasu: Oh Kami.**

**IK: I will go make eggs while singing the toast song**

**I: We are gonna die.**

**IK: Will not. Now say the stupid disclaimer.**

**All: ItaKure does not own Naruto.**

**IK: (in background) YEAH TOAST!**

* * *

"Has anyone seen the camera?" Kisame asked as he walked into the dining room.

"Why do you want the camera?" was the only response he got, which came from Deidara.

Kisame smirked and Deidara's question was answered. "Ask Tobi, he had it last. Oh, and make sure to tell us when you find it so we can get out of here before you get back at Itachi for kissing Kurenai."

"Thats not the reason I'm getting back at him!"

"Then what is?"

"Um..." Deidara smirked "He painted Samehada pink!"

"That was Tobes and you know it Same."

"Well Tobi is an idiot and doesn't know better so I'm taking it out on Itachi."

"Whatever."

And so the large blue shark man set off through the base looking for Tobi, the masked Uchiha idiot. Kisame found Tobi watching TV in the living room.

"Tobi."

"Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Sponge-"

"Tobi."

"Bob Squarepants!"

Kisame picked up the remote and turned off the TV before he got mad.

"Hey! That was the last episode in the marathon before the movie!"

Kisame ignored this and asked "Do you know where the camera is?"

"Hmm..." Tobi looked deep in thought or at least as deep in thought Tobi could get. "If Tobi were a camera where would he be?"

_'This is gonna take a while'_

Then out of nowhere Tobi jumped up and ran through the base yelling "TOBI IS A GOOD BOY!"

"TOBI, GET BACK HERE!"

**_xakatsukix_**

It was now ten in the morning and Itachi was just waking up. He looked at his Edward Scissorhands alarm clock (on top of which sat the newest Shinobi Dreams manga), groaned, pulled his black covers over his head, and muttered something about killing whoever turned off his alarm. He then he peeked out of the covers to the at his Nightmare Before Christmas calender. **(GH: you just had to didn't you? IK: Yup)**

_'Its Friday the 13th' _He thought sleepily and closed his eyes to go back to sleep.

5...

4...

3...

2...

1...

**_xakatsukix_**

_(Downstairs in the dining room)_

"ITS FRIDAY THE 13TH!" came Itachi's slightly muffled vioce.

"Here we go again." Sasori sighed

"Today is going to be one fucking long day." Hidan said.

The rest of the akatsuki agreed. Just then Kisame's vioce was heard. "Damnit! He's awake and we still haven't found it yet! Tobi, hurry up!"

They walked in and Tobi said "I think I put it in Zetsu's plant."

"Put what in my plant?"

"The video camera" Deidara said plainly as if it was an every day thing.

"Its not here."

"Not that one, _that _one." Tobes pointed at a giant venus flytrap.

Kisame glared and continued to search for the camera.

**_xakatsukix_**

"Settle down Itachi, as long as I be carefull I'll be ok." Itachi said as he paced around his room. Just then he heard a scratching at his window so he opened it. But nothing was there so he turned around and headed for his bathroom to take his morning shower. Once he reached his bathroom door he heard a meow. Itachi stiffened and slowly turned around.

**_xakatsukix_**

"Ow!" Kisame exclaimed.

"Well its not there. Its got to be in Kukuzu's money box, Sasori's puppet closet, Hidan's weapon drawer, or Deidara's clay pot."

"Are you serious?"

"Yup! Tobi is a good boy!" and with that Tobi ran off.

"TOBI!" Kisame chased after him. Then Konan walked in.

"Where have you been?" Pein asked.

"I bought a new mirror." she replied smiling and holding up a blue hand held mirror. Then her expression changed into a confused one and she looked around. "Has anyone seen Zorro?"

**_xakatsukix_**

Itachi stood there frozen, staring at the black cat that was sitting on the blood red sheets of his bed next to his black pillow. Then it jumped off the bed and walked towards him. Itachi stood there, still paralyzed with his inner screaming; _'SHUT THE DOOR!' _until... It touched him. What will the great Uchiha mass murderer do?

"..."

It rubbed up against his leg and looked up at him. "Meow."

"AAAAAAAAH!!" He ran out of his room screaming in nothing but his pajamas A.K.A... His boxers. Ah, the great Uchiha never ceases to amaze us.

Itachi ran into Konan who was right outside his door and still holding her mirror. "What the hell Itachi?!"

"Black cat." He said pointing in his room.

Konan walked in and a few seconds later came out holding Zorro. "Was the big scary Uchiha mean to you?" She looked at said Uchiha. "Why are you in your boxers?"

Itachi just stared at Zorro and backed up against the wall until he realized that the only way out was past the cat. He scrambled to his feet and ran, headed for his room, bumping into Konan again. Right as he reached his door, the sound of glass shattering reached his ears followed by "Damnit Itachi! I just bought this mirror!"

"AAAAAAH!" He ran downstairs and out into the backyard. Then he ran under a ladder and ran faster and screamed louder once he realized this.

At the top step of the ladder was none other than Tobi. "Tobi thinks its hanging in the chimney." Kisame, who was covered in wounds, grumbled and looked in the chimney... which he fell in.

**_xakatsukix_**

Pien chuckled. "Sounds like Kisame's fun has started without him."

"With Tobi being the last one to have the camera they'll never find it..." Kukuzu said.

"Which means Kisame will never video tape Itachi and put it on youtube..." Deidara continued.

"Yeah. And Kisames gonna go through a lot of pain to find it." Sasori finished.

**_xakatsukix_**

Hours later, around 8 pm, Itachi decided to go to bed before he did anything else to store up more bad luck. It wasn't long before he fell asleep. Then Tobi and Kisame walked in. **(IK: theyve had a long day... Itachi has done nothing but store up a lot of bad luck.)**

"I give up." Kisame sighed.

"Where's Itachi?" Tobi asked.

"Asleep." Dei answered.

"Well I'm going to bed too." And Tobes took off his mask. When it was an inch or two away from his face... "Hey Kisame."

"What"

"Look." Tobes turned the inside of the mask towards Kisame and waved at the mask.

Inside was the camera and it had been recording all day. This meant that it was hours full of Kisame yelling at Tobi, being told to look in stupid places, looking in those stupid places for the camera, getting hurt, absolutely nothing of Itachi, and now Tobi waving without his mask on.

The Akatsuki saw the murder and bloodlust in Kisame's eyes and yelled; "RUN!" while holding Same back.

Tobi tilted his head in confusion, shrugged, and skipped off singing the Indiana Jones theme song.

* * *

**I: That was not cool**

**K: I agree**

**Saku: You wrote your first comedy (giggling)**

**IK: Yeah but I'm gonna go back to-**

**Sasu: Angst (not too happy bout it)**

**IK: Yep and if I dont update for a while then its because I'm helping Glory-chan with her fanfics... or my family won't get off the computer.**

**Saku: Which one's your favorite?**

**IK: Tie between _Lost in Memories_, _Genetic Memories_, and _Sharkskin._**

**Saku: Ah**

**IK: Well, say bye everyone.**

**All: Ja ne! Review!**

**S,S,IK: (looks at Itachi and Kisame)**

**Sasu: (chuckles)**

**Girls: (giggles)**

**K,I: Its not funny!**

**I: And I am not superstitious!**

**K: Keep laughing and I'll rip up Star-chan**

**IK: O.O NOOOOOO! (hugs note book protectivley)**

**S,S: (busts up laughing)**

**IK: Hey watch out for _Vampiric Death _(makes handsign and turns Kisame into...)**


End file.
